[lucky 7s] 6.1.6 - don't need to be saved {private journal entry}

[Don't need to be saved.]

I know.

I think some part of me has always known, at least since all this started. It comes in drips and dribbles, the knowing. It’s a leak in my own head I haven’t been real sure what to do with. It reads like a story sometimes, one I didn’t realize I was listening to or even had my eye on. When it’s bad, it’s real fucking distracting…at it’s best, it helps a lot.

I talk to people, and I find myself weaving the words through the holes in every story. I patch their hurts using their own wounds against them, wounds I shouldn’t be able to see. They’re there, though, all in the story that runs constantly through my head. I know what tricks to do, I know who to touch and how.

I know. I think some part of me has always known. Maybe since day one, I can’t be sure.

There’s one in every bunch…a freak, a villain, a knight in shining armor. I don’t know which one I am, but I know it’s one of the three. I know a whole hell of a lot these days, and I wish to the gods I didn’t. Or maybe I’m wrong.

Maybe I should say ‘I wish to me.’

I know. I know I don’t want help, and I don’t want to be saved, I don’t need it. I know what happens when you try to save heroes…I don’t want that to happen to anybody I care about.

I know what happens ‘cause I know what already happened. All of it…every last second of it. I know, and I think some part of me has always known, all my life.

I know what it is to feel as the gods feel. I know what it is to know everything.

Muse: Tommy Karras
Fandom: Original Character
Words: 301

Got this off my girl Molly

Here are the rules:
1. Leave me a comment saying, "Interview me."
2. I will respond by asking you 5 questions of a very personal nature.
3. You will update your LJ with the answers to the questions.
4. You will include this and an offer to interview someone else in the post.
5. When others comment asking to be interviewed, you will ask them 5 questions.

( from Molly... )

( from Selene {tenebrae nostro}... )

( from Ambyr {tenebrae nostro}... )

[ptd] 5.7.5 - symbolism: heart

NOTE: Content of prompt is a dream Tommy's been having. Ziyah is zee_ali and is used with copious amounts of nearly religious adoration.

“I’m sorry.”

“Don’t be. I’m not.”

“But it hurts.”

He’s kneeling in the dirt, covered in a nauseating mess of filth and his own blood, seeping from the gaping hole in his chest. Standing before him, Ziyah is stained to her elbows in the red stuff pouring out of him.

His still beating heart is cradled in her arms, tucked against her chest like a suckling child.

“I don’t know how to put it back. I would if only I knew how.”

He’s raw and aching, struggling for breath through the slow burn at the jagged edges of the wound. Still, he’s strangely calm as he reaches for her, drawing her close as he wraps his arms around her legs.

“I’ll die if you give it back. It needs you to beat now.”

She tests his theory as she stoops, trying to shove it back into his chest. Each attempt leaves him cold and unable to draw air as the gently pulsing lump of muscle and blood sits nestled in the warm, wet cavern of bone it was torn from.

“I’m so sorry.” She’s weeping now, hair clinging to her cheeks with the moisture of her tears. “Baby…I never meant for this to happen.”

She’s cradling his heart again, and he’s hugging her knees with his face buried against her stomach. He nuzzles her belly button, bloodstained hand lifting to part the fabric of her buttondown shirt and trace the flat plane of pale skin, mapping the lines of the tattoo peeking out from her pants.

Today, the angel emerging from her lower abdomen is wearing handcuffs.

“I think,” he murmurs against her skin, “if we can get it in there, I’ll be all right.” He pauses, lifting his head to meet her gaze. “We need a miracle.”

She sighs, suddenly relieved as she sinks to her knees to kiss him. His heart continues to beat between her hands as she lovingly caresses the meaty organ.

“Lucky for us,” she sighs, leaning into him gratefully, shoulder catching in the gaping hole of his chest, “that’s something we both know plenty about.”

Muse: Tommy Karras
Fandom: Original Character
Words: 352

Hmph.

You Are Crayons

You've always had a creative, artistic streak - even when you were a kid. You were the type of child who could spend hours with a box of crayons or markers. Even now as an adult, colors and design matter to you. You are probably very fashionable and stylish. Maybe you even dabble in the arts from time to time. You certainly still have the talent.

What Childhood Toy Are You?

Blogthings: Quizzes and Tests and Memes, Oh My!